It looks like my hunch was confirmed. She did know the guy that was outside trying to smash the doors down. Not surprising really - it’s not the first fix she’s got herself into. It turns out it was her boyfriend.

One thing I did get wrong is that he spent the night locked up. I don’t know why the police stayed all night then. Maybe she was particularly grateful to them. They came back later today and carted off his van. I can’t say I’m sad to see that go. On cold mornings it took an age to start and it made an awful noise. There were dozens of mornings when I woke to the sound of an old clapped out van trying desperately hard to start and completely failing. Anyhoo, he’s gone and the van is gone which I reckon is good news for everyone involved.

Last night - well early this morning as guess it would be better to say - I was woken up by someone shouting his mouth off outside. At first I thought he was out our door - but luckily not. He was next door. At first I thought he must have been the world’s worst burglar because he was shouting to open the door (along with plenty of effing and jeffing). I thought maybe the tradition of the cat burglar had disappeared from our great nation to be replaced by someone just standing outside and demanding to be let in.

Pretty soon it became obvious that the guy was actually responding to someone. At which point I worked out that it must be someone they know. I mean, if it was a stranger you would start reasoning with them. You’d just call the police and hide upstairs. Maybe you’d baricade the door as well. The woman next door knows some dodgy guys and does put it about a bit. So it all fitted.

At this point things got a little more heated and he started pounding on the door. And he really was pounding. It felt like the whole house was shaking. It was crazy. I thought for sure he’d burst through their door. But it held firm.

Shortly after he gave up and must have wandered off. About ten minutes after that, the police showed up. They were wandering around all over the place looking for him. I guess they didn’t find him because they were still here this morning.

I must say, at no point in this story did I even consider helping the neighbors out. It’s all down to my complete cowardice I’m afraid.